"Pound" that stress out

It has been a long time since I last wrote! I am definitely feeling guilty about that. It was part so busy since Ben is away (the virgin islands, figures?!) and part not wanting to face my challenges. I was asked recently "how do you do it all?". I started rambling about my daily duties, and thought to myself "am I crazy?". My day starts as Mommy, waking up 2 sleepy non-morning loving children and forcing myself to get my day started too. Sometimes I have to coax those children out of an early morning meltdown just so I can start my day stress free! Then we drive to school and drive Macleod Trail to work. I try to squeeze an 8 hour work day into 5 hours and drive Macleod Trail again home. We start homework and dinner, which are easy, then it is either some extracurricular activity or I need to work some more. Bath and Bedtime, and the usual toothpick in the eyes to stay awake and clean the kitchen or laundry. Only to start all over again. This is the struggle of every Working Mom. We still have to make the lunches, listen to stories of "he said/she said" of school day interactions, drive to playdates and sports, get the groceries, think about healthy meals, remember birthdays and other relevant events, coach soccer, and the list goes on. Daddy's definitely have their roles too but they don't do the little everyday things that kids still need a mommy to do for them. Kids don't care if you are working or not - whether it be necessary or by choice.

What does all this mean?? Guilt. Yup, it is guilt. We never eat the last pickle in the pickle jar, even though we really want it! This guilt is always there for me. And now I am adding the guilt of not working out and not following my meal plan. The one thing that I was able to do, was avoid junk food. Until last night...I needed groceries and Friday night at 9:00pm was the only time I could get there this week. I was soooooo tired, and just plain exhausted from this past week, I gave in. I think I actually stopped at the front door to plan how I was going to cheat. Fortunately I was too tired to make a well executed plan of attack. I just wandered aimlessly picking up my usual purchases - salads, fruit, bread - and then I walked through the rest of the bakery. There is was, a lemon poundcake. It was so pretty sitting there, glistening (that is icing if you were wondering)like a ray of sunshine! I thought it would be nice to share with my company. LOL!

I have to say I am embarrassed by my thought process after I picked up that cake. I was planning how I was going to strategically place the cake on the checkout counter so that it would packed first and thus last in my trunk. Then I could just grab it out of the trunk and start eating it in the car before I drove away!!! Hilarious actually, ludicrous really?!! I didn't actually do that, thank god!! It is funny now, but I was 100% serious at the time. I just imagine myself ripping open the package and picking up the whole thing (I had no utensils or napkins) and eating it in the driver's seat of Ben's car. The crumbs would be flying and I would be planning how I was going to vacuum the car before Ben got home! I did take the cake home and I did share it, but my piece was definitely more generous than everyone else's!